No Greater Love

I have often written about how sweet and loving my little Lilliana is, but today my precious angel spread out her angelic wings extra far and wide.

My husband took her, Livea, and our little nephew to the pool for a short swim today. Apparently when the time came to get out, and while "Uncle Dean/Daddy" was drying off Livea, our little nephew decided he was big enough to try out the deep end of the pool. When my husband turned around all he saw was our nephew's precious head bobbing up and down.

I can imagine the panic my husband felt.

And there was Lilliana, off to the rescue, holding him up with her little hands and pushing him to the side as best she could for her Daddy to "save".

Our little man was just fine and hopefully learned a lesson.

If that isn't enough to make your heart skip a beat, then my next statement surely will..

My precious Lilliana......well, she can't swim either.

"Wantsomethingelseinization!"

LOL!!!!!!!

Today Lilliana and I had a mother/daughter day. I had much to get done for an upcoming trip and she was determined that Mom was more fun than a day at summer camp. So off we went to get a manicure/pedicure together to start off our fun-filled busy day!

She has very cute feet! Her precious little toes simply shine with blue sparkles and gemstones! She chose her colors well! However, on the way to our next stop after leaving the salon, Lilliana began doubting her choice.

I laughed! Lilliana! "I enjoyed my time with you at the salon! I LOVED seeing you fall back in your chair in endless giggles every time you got your feet massaged or rinsed!" I went on to tell her to focus on the good time we had and not doubt her decision. To be thankful!


But Mom, she said, I have that "thing"!

Ok...What "thing?'

You know, when you get what you thought you wanted and then when you got it you wished you had gotten something else.

LOL! I had her explain that to me three times before she finally said:

"Mom, I have the WANT-SOMETHING-ELSE-INIZATION . You know! That thing!"

Tearful Independence

My Precious, Loving, Sweet, Angelic Lilliana!

"Mommy, will you move my bed into your room?"

"Mommy, will you come with me to summer camp and be my teacher?"

"Mommy, Will you teach at my school and come with me every day?"

"Mommy, will you go with me on my "date out" with Trent and his mom. I've never ridden in a friend's car w/o you before. I'm nervous." (Well, that she can remember anyway.)

"Mommy, can I lay in your bed or will you come lay with me?"

"Mommy, how about a popcorn and movie night?"

To say that this child ADORES her parents is an UNDERSTATEMENT! I LOVE how much she needs and likes her mom and dad and I am doing my best to soak in EVERY minute of it!

I really needed to hear that 4th comment today! Actually, she has been saying these statements a lot over the last few months. This summer has been so wonderful as we have gotten so much closer (if that were possible) and she has matured so much! This bright and Lively middle child is one of the biggest blessings and causes for joy in our lives today! Add Livea to that, and well.......wow! Much laughter, hugging, kissing, etc.....!

We used to have special moments, sweet subtle moments, quiet hours of reading together, and such, with our first-born child, who is now 21. We had a lot of joy in our lives with her also. We love her dearly, as much as we do our other two. She grew up way too fast!

I always believed my first-born would always be close to us. That she would always "like" us :) and even want to be around us when she was...say..21. :) But Today, well, today marks the day she has clearly stated that although she does love us, she does not miss us. She is with her friends and that is where she wants to be. After all, when you left home Mom, did you want to go back?

I know, I know...they grow up and make their own lives, but...In my book, this transition to independence should feel more like a natural next step. Like a flower blooming or a caterpillar forcing its way out of a cacoon as a beautiful butterfly after much hard work to get free.

I really expected a positive, natural transition. I expected us to always stay close, regardless of what path this child with such a sensitive heart and giving spirit chose. I never expected to feel rejected by someone I loved more than anything in the world, although I am 100% sure my daughter never intentionally wanted to make me feel this way. Let's face it, we all resist "losing' our first child.

Nor have I ever experienced anything so painful. So tiring that it sometimes makes you feel as though you are stuck in the middle of a very long, difficult, heated race. A race in which the finish line is completely out of site.

I recently heard a radio broadcast about how runners felt during the most difficult part of the Boston Marathon. As I understand it, the pain and the effort required to finish is grueling. One runner was asked what she focused on at the hardest part of the run, often referred to as "Heartbreak Hill". Her reply......."just one more step, one more step, one more step "

I'm sure the thought of "one more step" was a small enough obstacle to overcome to get just a little further. A very successful and positive strategy for overcoming even the largest of obstacles. At that moment, however, every step still hurt like H! The pavement was still HOT. Feet still ached, Lungs were still gasping for air, every inch of the body probably screaming to just STOP.

I may have a hurt in my heart that never eases up with a big hole to go with it, but it also serves to remind me of someone else that felt that way. Someone that I probably hurt in the same way. Maybe all of this is a lesson in how much I am loved and was loved through some of my most selfish times. I am reminded of how much grace I have been given and that I should give the same in return.

For now, I have been given the brightest and sweetest angels to provide a double portion of laughter, love, joy, fun times, and teachable moments.

So...when these worries creep into my thoughts and threaten to distract me, I will just keep taking "one more step" and focus on the beautiful things that have been so divinely provided today.

An Angel Unaware

People who believe the Bible is the written word of God have probably read in that book about the possibility of 'entertaining angels aware'. I am beginning to think our sweet little Livea might just be one of those angelic beings.

In just the last few days, after correcting Livea for a minor misbehaviors, our sweet little angel has walked back to me with little tears wiped from eyes and said as clearly and as properly as you please, "Momma, I'm done crying now." (she is so sensitive - it doesn't take but a small scolding to correct her and even still, the tears flow)

She is only 2.5 years old and this precious angel has learned about correction and the positive purpose behind it; and she willingly and lovingly accepts it. Now, I can't speak for other parents out there, but for me, that is amazingly refreshing! My Lilliana has always been just as repentative and loving and for that we have been soooooooo thankful, but Livea just seems to take repentance and correction to a whole new level where timeliness and ability to move on are concerned. I never taught her to come back to me and say she was done crying now. Usually, if this happens I lovingly talk to her, kiss on her, and we move on. This sweet one has a "knowing perception" about so many things that in some ways, it is a little sad. How do children become so "knowing" so young? Well, either she was born that way, or it was what she saw at the orphanage, or she is an angel unaware :) Her obedience and happy disposition just amaze us!

One thing is for sure, she has become confident in the fact that she is loved and in the family structure she has been placed.

I also find it interesting that I have found myself in this place with her on this Easter holiday weekend. Easter, being all about Christ's redemptive love, parallels my story today. Just how beautiful our relationships are with one another and with our Father when we are accepting to correcting our mistakes and making things right. When we respect each other and those God has placed over us. Just as important, however, is having the courage to stand your ground against those needing correcting. Sometimes that is just as hard. But, my how we mess up our lives when we live in rebellion to everyone and everything around us unless it suites "our fancy".

I guess I have come to truly despise rebellion and the devastation it causes in the lives of our families. In turn, I guess I have come to appreciate obedience and humility so much more!

I am thankful for my little ones today, and the repentive and loving hearts they have. I pray with all my heart that this holds true through the all of their young adult years.

7 Months Home with our Sweet "Livea Lou Who"!

I realize I am a little overdue for Livea's 6-month's Home update, but what a busy season we have had! Miss "Livea-Lou-Who" as we sometimes like to call her, is doing wonderfully! She is a very happy little girl. She loves her entire family and seems to truly sense who is a relative and who is not. She is part of our entire family AND SHE KNOWS IT! :) She LOVES her Grandparents, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts and Uncles - ALL OF THEM! I have been in awe at how easily our sweet little daughter seems to sense who she belongs t0. Her hearts seems to know she is home!



The picture of the group of sweet angels here are my nieces and nephews on my husband's side of the family. You can see the spot Livea was standing in would have been empty w/o her and the little Family Tree of Cousins just would not have been complete on this very special Christmas holiday. (You might note that the signs say we are missing a few cousins - five of them to be exact.) What a nice big 'youngin" tree that would have been.

All of Livea'a Aunts and Uncle adore her and enjoy the sweet kisses she gives. They also seem to love feeding her. I caught several of them at Christmas just stuffing her little OPEN mouth with pies and other sweet goodies. For the longest time, Livea was like a little newborn bird. Always tipping her head up and opening her mouth for someone to put something yummy into. It is a good thing Aunt Letha and Uncle Keith don't live to close. As it is Aunt Sherry and Uncle Ryan do enough damage! :)



*If you look closely here, you can see that Livea has "chipmunk cheaks" :) One of her favorite meals after we brought her home was Cracker Barrel's Beef Stew.


Livea has changed so much since we brought her home. We have kept her on a tightly structured schedule/lifestyle; and due to her start to life, this has been one of the wisest things we could have done. She has been surrounded with people who love her and nurture her. And because of this, she has just blossomed. Gone are those little defensive tantrums she came to us with, replaced with sweet smiles, many kisses, and happy little girl giggles!

And Lilliana, LOVES her new baby sister! She is forever picking her up like a baby. Livea has grown so much since she came, though, I believe it is time Lilliana stopped carrying her around! Have I mentioned how very much our three daughters ADORE each other?!


Livea Loving on Daddy!

One thing that has not changed about our little "Bibbity-Bobbity-Boo" (which I sometimes call her as she loves princesses and wands and dresses!) is her obsessiveness with certain things. She will plant that kiss squarely on your lips, she will not willingly take off the pretty dress, and any stray objects on the floor will end up in the garbage! Dean laughs and tells me, "Well, Janie, you finally got one just like you! " (I think he called me obsessive compulsive! I choose to think we just like to do things right! :)

A few other things about Livea:



She likes Sandy blond-headed young ladies like Lindsay (my eldest) and my nieces Elizabeth, Keeley, Jenna, and a many others:)






She has a "Russian" "Look" when she means business! The only thing missing in this picture to make it more accurate would be her pointing her finger at you and "setting you straight"! :)



She LOVES to dance :) and Sing!

She insists on hearing her Russian bedtime stories every night!



She refuses to sleep anywhere except her own bed. But she does love the cuddle time in the rocking chair prior to sleep time. :)

She is so good at saying please and thank you!

She loves going bye-bye.

She will try any food once and always folds her hands to pray first.

She uses many russian and english words easily. I think young ones like her find this an easy task when they are exposed to both daily. She enjoys her russian videos as much or more than our english ones.


Things we are looking forward to this summer:

The beach. I know she will just love playing in the sand.

Playing with her cousins!


And...

Just being together every day!





Ok, just have to add one more thing....Did I mention our very smart little two year old can already read? :)

(Usually my sweet little angel closes her book and puts it at the end of the crib before shutting her eyes for her nap. Guess this one was too good to put down :)