Blessings..Spring Break and Easter 2012


Our angel has grown and changed so much. She continues to bless our home with her sweet giggles, beautiful voice, and feet that pitty patter by 7:30 a.m. like clockwork - Weekday or not :)

She loves her family, Disney World, Church, and the beach!




Lindsay...My Eldest

We are blessed with a daughter that has a deep and caring heart. Regardless of the depth of their hearts, the late teen and early twenties can be rough to navigate. I am thankful to have had Spring Break and Easter 2012 with her home and with her sisters. Her little sisters simply adore her and she them :)


My Dad with Lindsay :) I may just have this one framed :)



Poppa is smitten, I think...with his grand-daughters!






And...My Dear Lilliana...My sweet Easter
Baby turns 8 tomorrow :(











I am surrounded by nuts! :) Very lovely Nuts!

Mommy is smitten, too!








Thank you Lord, for my family!

No Greater Love

I have often written about how sweet and loving my little Lilliana is, but today my precious angel spread out her angelic wings extra far and wide.

My husband took her, Livea, and our little nephew to the pool for a short swim today. Apparently when the time came to get out, and while "Uncle Dean/Daddy" was drying off Livea, our little nephew decided he was big enough to try out the deep end of the pool. When my husband turned around all he saw was our nephew's precious head bobbing up and down.

I can imagine the panic my husband felt.

And there was Lilliana, off to the rescue, holding him up with her little hands and pushing him to the side as best she could for her Daddy to "save".

Our little man was just fine and hopefully learned a lesson.

If that isn't enough to make your heart skip a beat, then my next statement surely will..

My precious Lilliana......well, she can't swim either.

"Wantsomethingelseinization!"

LOL!!!!!!!

Today Lilliana and I had a mother/daughter day. I had much to get done for an upcoming trip and she was determined that Mom was more fun than a day at summer camp. So off we went to get a manicure/pedicure together to start off our fun-filled busy day!

She has very cute feet! Her precious little toes simply shine with blue sparkles and gemstones! She chose her colors well! However, on the way to our next stop after leaving the salon, Lilliana began doubting her choice.

I laughed! Lilliana! "I enjoyed my time with you at the salon! I LOVED seeing you fall back in your chair in endless giggles every time you got your feet massaged or rinsed!" I went on to tell her to focus on the good time we had and not doubt her decision. To be thankful!


But Mom, she said, I have that "thing"!

Ok...What "thing?'

You know, when you get what you thought you wanted and then when you got it you wished you had gotten something else.

LOL! I had her explain that to me three times before she finally said:

"Mom, I have the WANT-SOMETHING-ELSE-INIZATION . You know! That thing!"

Tearful Independence

My Precious, Loving, Sweet, Angelic Lilliana!

"Mommy, will you move my bed into your room?"

"Mommy, will you come with me to summer camp and be my teacher?"

"Mommy, Will you teach at my school and come with me every day?"

"Mommy, will you go with me on my "date out" with Trent and his mom. I've never ridden in a friend's car w/o you before. I'm nervous." (Well, that she can remember anyway.)

"Mommy, can I lay in your bed or will you come lay with me?"

"Mommy, how about a popcorn and movie night?"

To say that this child ADORES her parents is an UNDERSTATEMENT! I LOVE how much she needs and likes her mom and dad and I am doing my best to soak in EVERY minute of it!

I really needed to hear that 4th comment today! Actually, she has been saying these statements a lot over the last few months. This summer has been so wonderful as we have gotten so much closer (if that were possible) and she has matured so much! This bright and Lively middle child is one of the biggest blessings and causes for joy in our lives today! Add Livea to that, and well.......wow! Much laughter, hugging, kissing, etc.....!

We used to have special moments, sweet subtle moments, quiet hours of reading together, and such, with our first-born child, who is now 21. We had a lot of joy in our lives with her also. We love her dearly, as much as we do our other two. She grew up way too fast!

I always believed my first-born would always be close to us. That she would always "like" us :) and even want to be around us when she was...say..21. :) But Today, well, today marks the day she has clearly stated that although she does love us, she does not miss us. She is with her friends and that is where she wants to be. After all, when you left home Mom, did you want to go back?

I know, I know...they grow up and make their own lives, but...In my book, this transition to independence should feel more like a natural next step. Like a flower blooming or a caterpillar forcing its way out of a cacoon as a beautiful butterfly after much hard work to get free.

I really expected a positive, natural transition. I expected us to always stay close, regardless of what path this child with such a sensitive heart and giving spirit chose. I never expected to feel rejected by someone I loved more than anything in the world, although I am 100% sure my daughter never intentionally wanted to make me feel this way. Let's face it, we all resist "losing' our first child.

Nor have I ever experienced anything so painful. So tiring that it sometimes makes you feel as though you are stuck in the middle of a very long, difficult, heated race. A race in which the finish line is completely out of site.

I recently heard a radio broadcast about how runners felt during the most difficult part of the Boston Marathon. As I understand it, the pain and the effort required to finish is grueling. One runner was asked what she focused on at the hardest part of the run, often referred to as "Heartbreak Hill". Her reply......."just one more step, one more step, one more step "

I'm sure the thought of "one more step" was a small enough obstacle to overcome to get just a little further. A very successful and positive strategy for overcoming even the largest of obstacles. At that moment, however, every step still hurt like H! The pavement was still HOT. Feet still ached, Lungs were still gasping for air, every inch of the body probably screaming to just STOP.

I may have a hurt in my heart that never eases up with a big hole to go with it, but it also serves to remind me of someone else that felt that way. Someone that I probably hurt in the same way. Maybe all of this is a lesson in how much I am loved and was loved through some of my most selfish times. I am reminded of how much grace I have been given and that I should give the same in return.

For now, I have been given the brightest and sweetest angels to provide a double portion of laughter, love, joy, fun times, and teachable moments.

So...when these worries creep into my thoughts and threaten to distract me, I will just keep taking "one more step" and focus on the beautiful things that have been so divinely provided today.

An Angel Unaware

People who believe the Bible is the written word of God have probably read in that book about the possibility of 'entertaining angels aware'. I am beginning to think our sweet little Livea might just be one of those angelic beings.

In just the last few days, after correcting Livea for a minor misbehaviors, our sweet little angel has walked back to me with little tears wiped from eyes and said as clearly and as properly as you please, "Momma, I'm done crying now." (she is so sensitive - it doesn't take but a small scolding to correct her and even still, the tears flow)

She is only 2.5 years old and this precious angel has learned about correction and the positive purpose behind it; and she willingly and lovingly accepts it. Now, I can't speak for other parents out there, but for me, that is amazingly refreshing! My Lilliana has always been just as repentative and loving and for that we have been soooooooo thankful, but Livea just seems to take repentance and correction to a whole new level where timeliness and ability to move on are concerned. I never taught her to come back to me and say she was done crying now. Usually, if this happens I lovingly talk to her, kiss on her, and we move on. This sweet one has a "knowing perception" about so many things that in some ways, it is a little sad. How do children become so "knowing" so young? Well, either she was born that way, or it was what she saw at the orphanage, or she is an angel unaware :) Her obedience and happy disposition just amaze us!

One thing is for sure, she has become confident in the fact that she is loved and in the family structure she has been placed.

I also find it interesting that I have found myself in this place with her on this Easter holiday weekend. Easter, being all about Christ's redemptive love, parallels my story today. Just how beautiful our relationships are with one another and with our Father when we are accepting to correcting our mistakes and making things right. When we respect each other and those God has placed over us. Just as important, however, is having the courage to stand your ground against those needing correcting. Sometimes that is just as hard. But, my how we mess up our lives when we live in rebellion to everyone and everything around us unless it suites "our fancy".

I guess I have come to truly despise rebellion and the devastation it causes in the lives of our families. In turn, I guess I have come to appreciate obedience and humility so much more!

I am thankful for my little ones today, and the repentive and loving hearts they have. I pray with all my heart that this holds true through the all of their young adult years.

7 Months Home with our Sweet "Livea Lou Who"!

I realize I am a little overdue for Livea's 6-month's Home update, but what a busy season we have had! Miss "Livea-Lou-Who" as we sometimes like to call her, is doing wonderfully! She is a very happy little girl. She loves her entire family and seems to truly sense who is a relative and who is not. She is part of our entire family AND SHE KNOWS IT! :) She LOVES her Grandparents, Sisters, Cousins, Aunts and Uncles - ALL OF THEM! I have been in awe at how easily our sweet little daughter seems to sense who she belongs t0. Her hearts seems to know she is home!



The picture of the group of sweet angels here are my nieces and nephews on my husband's side of the family. You can see the spot Livea was standing in would have been empty w/o her and the little Family Tree of Cousins just would not have been complete on this very special Christmas holiday. (You might note that the signs say we are missing a few cousins - five of them to be exact.) What a nice big 'youngin" tree that would have been.

All of Livea'a Aunts and Uncle adore her and enjoy the sweet kisses she gives. They also seem to love feeding her. I caught several of them at Christmas just stuffing her little OPEN mouth with pies and other sweet goodies. For the longest time, Livea was like a little newborn bird. Always tipping her head up and opening her mouth for someone to put something yummy into. It is a good thing Aunt Letha and Uncle Keith don't live to close. As it is Aunt Sherry and Uncle Ryan do enough damage! :)



*If you look closely here, you can see that Livea has "chipmunk cheaks" :) One of her favorite meals after we brought her home was Cracker Barrel's Beef Stew.


Livea has changed so much since we brought her home. We have kept her on a tightly structured schedule/lifestyle; and due to her start to life, this has been one of the wisest things we could have done. She has been surrounded with people who love her and nurture her. And because of this, she has just blossomed. Gone are those little defensive tantrums she came to us with, replaced with sweet smiles, many kisses, and happy little girl giggles!

And Lilliana, LOVES her new baby sister! She is forever picking her up like a baby. Livea has grown so much since she came, though, I believe it is time Lilliana stopped carrying her around! Have I mentioned how very much our three daughters ADORE each other?!


Livea Loving on Daddy!

One thing that has not changed about our little "Bibbity-Bobbity-Boo" (which I sometimes call her as she loves princesses and wands and dresses!) is her obsessiveness with certain things. She will plant that kiss squarely on your lips, she will not willingly take off the pretty dress, and any stray objects on the floor will end up in the garbage! Dean laughs and tells me, "Well, Janie, you finally got one just like you! " (I think he called me obsessive compulsive! I choose to think we just like to do things right! :)

A few other things about Livea:



She likes Sandy blond-headed young ladies like Lindsay (my eldest) and my nieces Elizabeth, Keeley, Jenna, and a many others:)






She has a "Russian" "Look" when she means business! The only thing missing in this picture to make it more accurate would be her pointing her finger at you and "setting you straight"! :)



She LOVES to dance :) and Sing!

She insists on hearing her Russian bedtime stories every night!



She refuses to sleep anywhere except her own bed. But she does love the cuddle time in the rocking chair prior to sleep time. :)

She is so good at saying please and thank you!

She loves going bye-bye.

She will try any food once and always folds her hands to pray first.

She uses many russian and english words easily. I think young ones like her find this an easy task when they are exposed to both daily. She enjoys her russian videos as much or more than our english ones.


Things we are looking forward to this summer:

The beach. I know she will just love playing in the sand.

Playing with her cousins!


And...

Just being together every day!





Ok, just have to add one more thing....Did I mention our very smart little two year old can already read? :)

(Usually my sweet little angel closes her book and puts it at the end of the crib before shutting her eyes for her nap. Guess this one was too good to put down :)

One Week Home!

September 7, 2010
10 days home

All is well with Miss Livea on the home front! She has/is adjusting so well and seems to love her new home here in Tennessee! Yesterday we took her on her first visit to one of our state parks and she seemed to really love it! She seems so easy-going and happy. We feel truly blessed and thankful!



Lilliana loves her new baby sister! Livea likes her new big sister as well, and looks for her during the day when Lilliana is school.








Livea likes Sunday school, especially snack time :) I think it was something familiar. :)
Oh, and she is smitten with Uncle Ryan and the playground!






Playing Hide and Seek with her Papa! Livea met this grandpa for the first time today and they hit it off almost immediately! Dad is good with kids and has always been close to his grandchildren. Livea still has two grandparents left to meet and many aunts, uncles and cousins. Our sweet little angel has much fun in her future!

Welcome Home Livea Kara-Ann!

I still feel as if I am in a dream, holding Livea each day and actually seeing her smiling face and sweet eyes look up at me. Our first four days at home together have been wonderful and it seems like our new little one just fits right into our home and our lives, like she is just supposed to be here.

Dean arrived in Atlanta with Livea late Friday evening and as soon as they crossed the arrivals lobby I scooped our little one up in my arms! She remembered me! Even though she was tired she played with us in the vehicle on the way home from the airport - sporting sunglasses, clapping, and crossing her arms in a cute little hip hop pose! (The orphanage caregivers in Kaz teach the children music and dance).

We kept her on the same schedule she was used to at the orphanage and she seems to be doing really, really well with that! We are definitely going to need to keep her on a structured schedule as this seems to make her feel secure. Yesterday I put her on the potty before I fed her and that brought tears and cries. What was I thinking!? Potty time is after supper! I wondered if the sweet angel thought she wasn't going to get to eat that night?! I quickly fixed my mistake and all was well again!

We took her to church Sunday morning and Livea got to attend her very first Children's Church with Mrs. Anna, and Big Red and the rest of the puppets. It was a very special moment and I had a hard time keeping the tears in check. We then went into "big church" where Aunt Sherry insisted on putting Livea to sleep in her arms. I can't believe I left my camera at home!

Each day I think I spoil her a little more. She now wants to be held more and more and when I put her down for a nap or to bed she lifts her arms up, says Ma, cuddles up in my arms and expects me to cuddle and rock her for a few minutes before I lay her down! It is as if she is just soaking in our love and attention!

She is such a sweet little angel and we are so thankful and so blessed that God allowed us the privilege of this journey.

Here's a video of Livea playing in the floor.

And another of Livea and Lilliana playing.



Livea sneaking bread out of the bread bag while Dean was checking messages :) I guess she was hungry!

Before we end this post we both want to thank those who helped us out along the way. Last December many people bought poinsettias from us because they wanted to be a part of this adoption. We raised several hundred dollars and used that money while in Kazakhstan to help purchase vitamins, bottles for babies with special feeding needs, scales to weigh the babies, and a push-reel mower for the orphanage. I would also like to thank our families for their prayers, encouragement, and for helping us out with Lilliana while we traveled! That was hard. But I know it has made a meaningful impact on Lilliana, Lindsay, and my other nieces and nephews that went through that time with her.
Thank you Pastor Kelvin for being willing to listen to God's leading and then share it with us on Sunday mornings. So many times I would come to Church with doubts and questions and your sermon that morning would be perfectly orchestrated.

I've always wondered exactly how the scripture "I will reveal Myself to you through My Word" actually worked. As we worked through this Journey to Livea, God revealed his faithfulness to us one day at a time, based on what His Word said and as we stepped each day in trust. He showed us that the journeys we take with him will be fruitful. We also learned that He doesn't just send money magically LOL. We always had sacrifices to make as we continued with the steps in the adoption process. We have grown. We have learned. And we are Amazed and in Awe of today's reality.

When we started this journey on June 10th, 2008, our child was not even born yet. Yet on faith (due to God's consistent prodding!) we stepped out, not knowing where the path would lead. Over the course of time, God provided for our every need, and ultimately led us to the Shapagat Baby House in Karaganda, Kazakhstan, where we met a sad little girl with the most beautiful eyes. And on August 27, 2010, we brought Livea Kara-Ann Holland home.

He who calls you is faithful; he will surely do it. (1 Thes. 5:24)

Embassy Day

Wednesday, August 25th - Almaty, Kazakhstan
I can't believe it's almost over. Today, our group of four had appointments at the US Embassy in Almaty to sign the final paperwork and get our children's visas for entering the United States. I did have a moment of panic, though, when after handing my paperwork to the authorities, they told me Janie had to be there because she had signed our I600 as the petitioner. Rush of crud to the heart! I could just see me being stuck in Almaty another 4 or 5 days waiting on new paperwork and appointments!

Fortunately, my wife was smart enough to sign a blank I600 as the petitioner's spouse in the event we got it wrong the first time. And that's why I married her - brains and beauty! I'm going to quit telling blond jokes for a few days...

Come to find out, Sue and Al had it wrong the first time as well, but Sue was also smart enough to redo the forms (before traveling). That's it. No more talking about how smart our wives are. On second thought, look who they married! How 'bout it Al?

Tomorrow night late, Sue, Lisa, and I will travel to the airport to finally return home with our new children. Sharon will return the US the next night. Hallelujah!

I took the above picture tonight in my hotel room. What a good looking couple. Hey Brian Meckler - notice that the bottles in the background are WATER! I've been Coca-Cola free since we returned from Karaganda!

It's a long story, but the four of us ended up in two different hotels. Lisa and Sharon are staying at the Astra, and Sue and I are at the Holiday Inn. Yes, they do have a Holiday Inn in Kazakhstan. Yeah, I was shocked too! Turns out to be a right nice place.

So last night, Sue and I decided to order room service instead of trying to take the children out to a restaurant when we had absolutely no idea where to go. Besides, it's much easier to let the children play in the floor while you eat. You can imagine the room service lady's confusion when I ordered two meals, one for room 808, and another for room 809. But deliver them to 808. The girl that delivered the meals had a weird grin when she brought in our food.

Well tonight, the four of us gathered at the Holiday Inn after our embassy appointments. And yes, we ordered our dinner via room service, this time for all to be delivered to my room. Now there's four babies playing in the floor. The girl that delivered the meals this time had a confused look when she saw our particular arrangement. Shoulda told her I was Mormon!

So before we broke for the night, I took this "family" photo. Pictured are Sue and Astana, Lisa and Tia, Me and Livea, and Sharon and Alec. Oh yeah, I am a lucky guy.

Yesterday, Sue and I took our kids for a stroll around town. Actually, I strolled and Sue used a... whatever you call those things that let you carry a baby on either the front or the back. Almaty is way different than Karaganda. It's actually a fairly modern city, and many people speak English. However, the people here drive like they think they are Dale Earnhardt Sr. And I'm not sure why they go to the trouble of painting lines on the roads...

I took the above picture of the Holiday Inn on an afternoon stroll with Livea. You don't see a lot of architecture like this in the US. Fortunately, you don't see the underlying structural quality in the states either! We tried to take the children out in strollers this morning, but got rained out. Seriously, I think it only rains a few days a year here, and we've been here for 3 of them!

Here's Sue and Astana in front of some statue commemorating Kazakhstan's independence from the Soviet Union in 1986.


We have a whole day to kill tomorrow, and Sue's husband Al Strong Man Blond is "encouraging" us to visit a place that you have to climb 1200 steps to get to the destination - a view overlooking the city and the new Olympic soccer(?) stadium. Let's see here, we carry two kids, one 20lbs. and the other 22lbs, up over 60 stories-worth of stairs! And then you have to come back down again! OK Al, here's the deal. If I can pull it off without lagging embarrassingly behind your wife, I expect a box of fresh New York apples on my front porch sometime in October!

Skype has been a lifesaver for us. Here is Lilliana and Livea "skyping".


Since I had time tonight, I've included some video for your viewing pleasure.

Sunset over Almaty from my hotel window.

Livea playing in a chair.

Livea making faces. The female voice in the background is Janie connected in via video Skype.

I can't close out tonight without thanking the God of Creation for calling us to this mission, and then supplying our every need to make it happen. And as a bonus, he threw in 5 new friends for life. Sue, Al, Sharon, Lisa, Brian - we love you guys!

To God be the glory.

Dean

She's Ours!

Almaty, Kazakhstan - August 23, 2010 Monday
Oh glorious day! After all this time, we finally have our Livea! And in four long days, I'll have her home in Tennessee to be united with her mother and new sisters. Oh that the time would pass quickly!

My flight arrived in Almaty at midnight, Sunday night. By 1:30am, I was checked into my hotel. By 6:20am, I had taken custody of our new girl! Here's a couple pictures from day one. More later!

Dean

Returning to get Livea

Well, Dean should arrive in Frankfurt in less than three hours. He will head to Almaty about seven hours later to await Livea's arrival.
I would love to be with him but our sweet Lilliana really needed one of her parents to stay with her this time and my job wasn't as accommodating as Dean's.
We are very blessed that Dean works for a company that fully supports adoption and actually exists for profit to be able to care for the needs of orphans.
I can only imagine how Livea will react to seeing her "Da Da" again and I look forward to seeing her on skype when he gets her back to the hotel!
Safe travels my dear ones!